Why Family??
Hello everyone!! And welcome to Contemplating Family!!
As I’ve been thinking about what to write and how to say
what is in my heart, I’ve continually been impressed to simply talk about why
the family is important to me. There is a lot going on in the world right now,
and it can be kinda scary to try to navigate, especially in trying to manage
our families. But the biggest thing I’ve recognized recently is the impact my family has made on me!!
I’d like to contemplate that thought for a moment.
Our families have such an impact on us: our lifestyle, where
we live, what brand of cereal we like, who we tell all our secrets to, who you talk
to at unearthly hours of the night, so many things!!
What kind of impact has your family made on you??
For me, my family has been something I’ve relied on heavily
my whole life!! They are the people I know I can turn to in a moments notice. In
my church, we believe that family is so important that God ordained it!! He created
us to be part of these units to help us create safe, stable environments where
we can cultivate feelings of love, patience, and respect for one another while
also “living after the manner of happiness” (Book of Mormon, 2 Nephi 5:27).
And yet, with the wonderful family that I have now, and the
family I know God has prepared for me, it still scares me to start one of my
own. This fear has been supported by popular culture today, stating that we need
to take care of ourselves first, and we don’t need anyone else to be there or
be in the way of ourselves, or that you need tons of money to have kids or a
family. (This idea is called Individualism) In other words, family is not your first priority.
But shouldn’t it be??
There have also been
multiple studies which have shown the strengths that a family can bring to the
table. Strengths such as being given a safe space to learn the basic principles
of life, like basic survival skills, social skills, and life skills. It also
provides the groundwork for better
health and wellbeing for everyone involved.
But why don’t we know more about these things?? Why, as the
public, do we hardly ever hear about these basic foundational points of the
family??
This is because of the difficulties that comes with
researching family. As one can imagine, researching about the family is so
difficult!! A scientist or researcher can’t ethically control a family or
individuals’ experience in the family, that would just be wrong. Thus
researchers have to find new and different ways to study the family that is not
invasive to the members. So, what do they do?? They use methods of research
such as surveys, questionnaires, or tests. Generally, this is done with sample
groups that would represent the population as a whole. This presents its own
challenges. Sometimes, those who are surveyed may be biased in their opinion
of, say, their parenting. Or some sample groups may not do a great job at
representing the population (for example, groups of Caucasian couples living in
southern Idaho wouldn’t give a great understanding of the rest of the United
States) On top of that, many researchers publish articles about families that
could be biased and controversial, which may cause threats to come to the
researcher or the publisher. This makes general distribution of the facts much harder
to come by. This is why it is so vitally important to really contemplate the "why's" of the family, and look at the true supporting facts that come with it.
So, what have we learned:
That the family is an amazing cultivating ground for future
life. The family holds so much importance in the world today, and yet people
tend to gloss over the beauty of it. It is therefore our duty to really dig in
and understand the workings of the family for ourselves so we can lead lives in line with the true ideals of the family.
I know of the importance of families. Yes, I may have some
hesitancies, but I know that it is such a sacred responsibility that our loving
Heavenly Father has given to me and to each of us!! What have YOU learned?? I
would love to hear some of your thoughts and questions in the comments!!
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